Stupidity loves Company
by Chagen46
Summary: Kavan Symanov is a normal guy.....That is, till he meets a rip-off of Solid Snake, two 60-year-old guys dressed up as 13-year-old girls, and a whole lot more! His life is gonna' be many things, but normal sure as hell isn't one of them!


Hello, and welcome to the first chapter of Stupidity loves company! This is a comedy fanfic, built beacause I just love to make people laugh! I hope this story entertains you!

(P.S: When you see a lot of hyphens, like "----------" That means that the story is going to another event happening at the same time, featuring different characters)

----------------

Stupidity loves company: Chap.1: Solid snake rip-offs, and….gay dawn-look-a-likes…?

Welcome to the good old boring Sinnoh, where we are about to watch a mary sue trainer embark on a clichéd adventure….

Oh…..wait, wrong story, my bad.

Moving on, it's still the good old boring Sinnoh. But, Kavan Symanov was anything but boring; at least, that's what the advertisements about this fanfiction said….

There was a lot you noticed about Kavan when you first saw him, like his jet black biker jacket that was covered in paintings of ice shooting upwards (like the tip of a glacier). This same color style was on the jeans he wore, You rarely got to see his face, for he wore a flat-topped derby hat (he was kind of eccentric) that had the same color style. He didn't take crap, and was pretty smart for a thirteen-year-old.

Or, so he said…

Anyway, he was just getting ready to embark on a boat trip to the battle frontier, the heart of Pokémon battling in these parts. He, more exactly, was on the way to the newly built Smogon University, where he would spend his 7th and 8th grade school years.

"Kavan! Wake up!" He heard his mother yell from the hallway of his apartment.

"Mom…." He glanced over at the clock beside his bed. "the friggin' boat isn't going to' appear till noon! That's four hours from now!"

"I don't care; get out of bed!"

Realizing that his mother wasn't going to budge, Kavan dragged himself out of bed. He glanced outside his window, and saw his hometown, Jubilife. "Not gonna' be seeing you for a while, Jubilife." He walked over to the one pokeball he had. "And, you, Lunto, you've been itching for some action, haven't you?" He Threw the pokeball onto the ground; it popped open, and a Lucario came out.

"Hell, yeah, you will!" Lunto said back.

Kavan wasn't surprised that Lunto talked; ever since he could remember, he knew he had an odd hearing defect; this defect allowed him to talk to Pokémon like they were humans; their cries were human speech to him. He kept it secret, so everyone wouldn't think he was a weirdo.

--------------------

Deep into the distance, far away from Kavan could see, was a lone man. It was quite hard to see him, for he was cloaked well in the brush. He saw all of Jubilife, in its glory.

The part he was spying on was recently built. In the middle was a newly built canal that flowed to a natural lake The whole area was extremely sloped, with very steep slopes; most people didn't drive, but took trolley's, subways, or simply walked. The man himself was looking from a cliff at the very edge of the city and was the highest point; it simply dropped-off more and more form there till the canal was reached. One the right side was the downtown area; the left was where all the housing and small buisness's were.

Soon, he heard a radio on his ear come on. He put his finger to it. "Hello?"

Another man replied. "Hello, Maverick. Have you seen the boy yet?"

"Yes, I have, Okaton. He's going to be leaving for that school, Smogon University."

"Good, follow him there."

"By the way, Okaton……why am I following this guy?"

"Why do you care, Maverick? I'm a parody of Otacon from Metal gear: solid and you're a parody of Solid Snake from that same series! We exist in this story for sheer comedic value!"

"Well, at least I was a rip-off of the cool character." Maverick inched forward a few steps, then felt the ground crumble beneath him. "Oh, s**t….."

"Maverick, what happened?"

"I'm going to fal-" Maverick then fell down the cliff-side. (He'll be perfectly fine; after all, he's kind of needed…)

"Maverick!!?? MAVERICK!!!?? MAVERICKKKKKKKKKK!!!!???"

---------------

Kavan completely ignored Maverick falling down the cliff-side (though he was looking right at it) when he walked through the city streets; he simply wanted to get to the area where all the other students were. He looked at the card that said where to go, and the number of his group—"Group 34"—and looked around. Odd, he didn't see it anywhere….

"Hey, you're on group 34 also? God dammit!"

Kavan looked around to see he one person he disliked: Paul. Paul was a bastard, through and through. He already had that annoying purple hair (In Kavan's views, his hair was so much better. Paul countered this by saying that no one ever sees Kavan's hair), but that modest gray t-shirt combined with that Royal Purple over-shirt made Kavan think lowly of Paul to begin with. (Paul, like usual, countered this by saying that Kavan's jacket was only good for looks, that it was pretty flammable, and that basing your opinion of someone based on the clothes they wear was something only gay men and women do.). The two shared similar tastes in jeans, though Paul didn't have the ice graphics on his, of course.

What really irked Kavan, however, was that Paul was always better than him. Always. Paul just knew something Kavan didn't, and his prediction skills were amazing. Paul always knew what the opponent was going to do, and exactly how they would do it.

Topping things off, Paul shred the same strange defect that Kavan had; this annoyed both of them, they felt less unique knowing that there was someone else like them.

"Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in." Kavan jeered. "Stopped sucking your own d*ck long enough to talk to me?"

"Shut up, mister Russian. All you are is an annoying brat. What, did you chop your balls off when you were eight, or something?" He looked over at Lunto, and scowled. "And I see that your Lucario is still a piece of trash."

"Hey!" Lunto snapped. "I'm not trash! At least I'm not like your aggravating Blaziken!"

"You know, Paul, why are you even going to this school, when you have a fully evolved starter? Surely you know how to battle?"

"Hah, Kavan, you ask that question? You know why, we may have ridiculously evolved Pokémon, but we still need to earn the correct way of battling!"

"But, why, Paul? You can predict anything! Why should you of all people, need to learn battling?"

"I may be able to predict, but I still am an in-experienced battler. I only got this Blaziken from my brother, you know."

"And, I only got Lucario after rescuing him for a fi-"

"LOOK OUT!!!!!!!"

Before Kavan could even turn around (or even send the signal to his legs to turn around), someone collided at top-speed into him; this sent Kavan into Paul, who promptly flew a good ten feet.

"Hey, you slowed me down! I demand 100 poke' from both of you as compensation for that!"

"What!?" Kavan and Paul said at the same time. "But we haven't even seen you yet!!!"

"Well, get up!"

Kavan and Paul both staggered to their feet, and saw the kid who had run into them. He wasn't that tall, considering how hard he had smashed into Kavan. His attire was familiar to Kavan; It was the outfit of the trainers that hung around the arcade, with a sweater that had alternating white and orange striped, and an odd green tie…. (Kavan had noticed that those arcade-goers were quite odd….) Moving on, his jeans were some kind of gray. (Finally, someone without gray jeans!) His blonde hair was some kind of odd style, with the ends looking sort of like two mountains slowly rising up into small peaks. He had a single backpack that looked stuffed.

"So, you ran into us." Kavan said.

"Indeed, he did." Paul replied.

The kid extended his hand out. "Well, where's my compensation!?"

"Who are you?" Kavan asked with an incredulous look on his face.

The kid proudly raised his right hand and saluted. 'Me? Why, my name is Barry, of course! You may have not heard of me, but I'll take this place by storm!"

"…..Are you going to Smogon University?"

"Why yes….actually, do you know where group 34 is?

"We were looking for that two…"

"Well, let's just go together!"

"Wait!" Kavan quickly objected. "If we go together, stupid fangirls are going to think we're all gay for each other!"

"They would think anyway." Paul retorted.

"Yeah, your kind of right. Let's just go."

----------------

On top of a skyscraper, two stereo-typical white thirteen-year-old teenage girls were staring at the three boys; well……they weren't actually thirteen; hell…they weren't even girls. They were, in fact, two men in their sixties(?) who were spying. (Why they had to be in those costumes, not even the lord knew) One had a briefcase.

The first one ("she" had blonde hair; the other one had black hair) looked over at Kavan. "We must get the egg to him before it hatches, Mark!"

"That's fine, Rog, but why are we wearing these costumes?"

"I don't know, it was your idea, pedo!"

"Well, we must get the egg to him fast. However, because someone didn't get those voice changers, we still sound like sixty-year-old men!"

"Hey, Mark, I'm on a budget here! We have to make sacrifices! You know we spent a crap-load of money on the costumes, and a bunch of time explaining why we needed these costumes!"

Just at that point, Maverick climbed up to the roof of that skyscraper. He stared at the "girls" for a second. "Who the hell are you!?"

"I'm Mar- I MEAN, I'M MARRISSA!"

"You sound like an old man…..screw it, I'm gonna throw a grenade and forget this all happened.

"Wait, if you throw that, we'll all fall sixty stories…"

Maverick had already grabbed the grenade on his belt and threw it. It exploded, knocking all three of them off the skyscraper.

"OH, S**T, WE'RE FALLIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!"

------------------

Maverick fell into a truck transporting pillows. (Ah, the stereo-typical conveniently placed item in a story)

"Who the hell would leave a truck open like this?" He grunted as he jumped out. "Hey, I'm all for conveniently placed items, but that was….too convenient…." He noticed that he was on a steep slope.

"I see that you are on a mission, Maverick."

Maverick twirled around to see the person he heard. He saw nobody, but then witnessed as the very champion, Cynthia herself, "phased" in front of him.

"What the hell?"

Cynthia calmly stroked her hair. "What? It's just one of Okaton's inventions!"

"Yeah," Maverick stuttered as he reached for a pistol. ",but….you….phased into reality!!"

"Your friend simply makes amazing inventions."

Maverick pointed the gun at Cynthia's face. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

Cynthia slapped the gun out of his hand, caught it, and pointed it at his face. "I'm simply here, on request of your friend, Jenny.

Maverick took interest, suddenly; Jenny was an operative for the army who had known Maverick when he was in the army. He hadn't seen her ever since he had been kicked out three years ago.

"What does Jenny want?"

"She's working at Smogon University. Says it's something very important."

"That's all she told you?"

"Yes. She says it's linked to the mission that you and Okaton are undertaking."

"Interesting….." Maverick then pointed at Kavan and company. "Say, do you know any of the boys down there?"

Cynthia looked over to check. "No, but I do know the girl running to meet them."

Maverick looked over to see a girl, who literally looked exactly like Cynthia running to meet the boys. "Her? It's going to take her around 20 minutes, even running at that speed. Who is she?"

"My sister, Mau-ri."

"Sister? Surprising…. Wait, how do you know Jenny?"

"I can't tell you that."

-----------------

It was barely a few seconds before Kavan started running, that he slipped on an oil slick.

"Ah, what the hell!?"

"Gay-boy away!"

Someone landed in front of Kavan, and proudly held his hand up. He was….very disturbing, considering that he looked like a girl Kavan had heard of; her name was Dawn. He looked way too much like her; all the way down to the color of his hair.

"Who the hell are you?" Kavan asked as he staggered to his feet, making sure not to slip again.

The boy proudly held his hand up. "Why, I am Gabriel, of course! And, it doesn't look good for you!" He made sure to make his voice sound extremely effeminate.

"Why?"

"Because, If you trip, you're secretly gay and want to bat around my white sausage."

"Nice try, Gay-Boy, but I'm not going to bat around your white sausage."

"Dammit!!!"

----------------

Maverick watched as Gabriel conversed with Kavan. "Damn, that guy looks straight gay!" He then peered at Mau-ri running to meet the others. He noticed that two other girls were running after her. "Wait a minute, I know those girls running with your sister! They were in the file Okaton gave me! Their names are May and Misty…. Wait, Misty's a Kantonian Gym Leader! Why would she be with them?" Maverick started running towards them. "I've got to find out. This could help my investigation!"

"Wait!" Cynthia yelled as Maverick ran. "There's an oil sli-"

Maverick was already too far ahead. As he turned around to reply, he slipped on the slick, and started sliding down the slope. He then crashed into a huge bunch of oil drums, coating himself in oil, causing him to slide even faster.

"SH*****TTTTT!!!!!!!!"

-----------------

Mau-ri ran ever faster as she dashed down the slope. "Man, those twenty-three liters of soda I had today really paid off! I've never ran this fast! But, I have to stay focused! I must get this letter to Kavan and those guys!"

Behind her, May and Misty were running as fast as they can. "Man, Mau-ri, do you ever tire out!?" May asked, incredulous at Mau-ri's ability to run for hours on end and never get tired.

"Nope!"

"Well, I hope we get to them in time. I'm going to be learning how to be an instructor for this school, so I hope we can get this over with soon!" Misty said.

"Why aren't you a Gym Leader anymore, Misty?" Mau-ri asked, still running at top speed. "Quit?"

"Yeah, I just felt like being an instructor; you know teaching people how to battle. I'll still be a student there anyway." Misty replied.

----------------

Maverick was still sliding on the slope at incredible speed. He then saw that he would collide with the girls.

"LOOKKK OUUTTTT!!!!!!!"

It was, unfortunately, too late. May (She was at the back of the pack) saw Maverick right before he collided right into all three of the girls. The quadruplet then flew down the slope even faster than Maverick was already travelling.

They then reached the four boys, and smashed right into all of them. The septuplet then was knocked about thirty feet in the air, before hitting the, cold, hard, concrete.

"What…..happened……?" Kavan stuttered as he struggled to regain consciousness.

Maverick got up and immediately started to apologize. "Oh, I am so sorry for causing all of this…."

-----

Mark and Rog had landed on some hard, tracks of some kind. Mark continued to look through the binoculars. "Dammit, this guy might get in our way! We have to get the egg to Kavan!"

"Mark…" Rog stammered, as he looked uneasily away from Mark.

"What?"

"I'll let you know we're about to hit by a train."

----------------------------------------

Well, there you go, the first chapter! Solid snake look-a-likes, sixty-year-old men dressed up as teenage girls, and gay dawn look-a-likes? This isn't your average fanfic, that's for sure!

Hello, and welcome to the first chapter of Stupidity loves company! This is a comedy fanfic, built beacause I just love to make people laugh! I hope this story entertains you!

(P.S: When you see a lot of hyphens, like "----------" That means that the story is going to another event happening at the same time, featuring different characters)

----------------

Stupidity loves company: Chap.1: Solid snake rip-offs, and….gay dawn-look-a-likes…?

Welcome to the good old boring Sinnoh, where we are about to watch a mary sue trainer embark on a clichéd adventure….

Oh…..wait, wrong story, my bad.

Moving on, it's still the good old boring Sinnoh. But, Kavan Symanov was anything but boring; at least, that's what the advertisements about this fanfiction said….

There was a lot you noticed about Kavan when you first saw him, like his jet black biker jacket that was covered in paintings of ice shooting upwards (like the tip of a glacier). This same color style was on the jeans he wore, You rarely got to see his face, for he wore a flat-topped derby hat (he was kind of eccentric) that had the same color style. He didn't take crap, and was pretty smart for a thirteen-year-old.

Or, so he said…

Anyway, he was just getting ready to embark on a boat trip to the battle frontier, the heart of Pokémon battling in these parts. He, more exactly, was on the way to the newly built Smogon University, where he would spend his 7th and 8th grade school years.

"Kavan! Wake up!" He heard his mother yell from the hallway of his apartment.

"Mom…." He glanced over at the clock beside his bed. "the friggin' boat isn't going to' appear till noon! That's four hours from now!"

"I don't care; get out of bed!"

Realizing that his mother wasn't going to budge, Kavan dragged himself out of bed. He glanced outside his window, and saw his hometown, Jubilife. "Not gonna' be seeing you for a while, Jubilife." He walked over to the one pokeball he had. "And, you, Lunto, you've been itching for some action, haven't you?" He Threw the pokeball onto the ground; it popped open, and a Lucario came out.

"Hell, yeah, you will!" Lunto said back.

Kavan wasn't surprised that Lunto talked; ever since he could remember, he knew he had an odd hearing defect; this defect allowed him to talk to Pokémon like they were humans; their cries were human speech to him. He kept it secret, so everyone wouldn't think he was a weirdo.

--------------------

Deep into the distance, far away from Kavan could see, was a lone man. It was quite hard to see him, for he was cloaked well in the brush. He saw all of Jubilife, in its glory.

The part he was spying on was recently built. In the middle was a newly built canal that flowed to a natural lake The whole area was extremely sloped, with very steep slopes; most people didn't drive, but took trolley's, subways, or simply walked. The man himself was looking from a cliff at the very edge of the city and was the highest point; it simply dropped-off more and more form there till the canal was reached. One the right side was the downtown area; the left was where all the housing and small buisness's were.

Soon, he heard a radio on his ear come on. He put his finger to it. "Hello?"

Another man replied. "Hello, Maverick. Have you seen the boy yet?"

"Yes, I have, Okaton. He's going to be leaving for that school, Smogon University."

"Good, follow him there."

"By the way, Okaton……why am I following this guy?"

"Why do you care, Maverick? I'm a parody of Otacon from Metal gear: solid and you're a parody of Solid Snake from that same series! We exist in this story for sheer comedic value!"

"Well, at least I was a rip-off of the cool character." Maverick inched forward a few steps, then felt the ground crumble beneath him. "Oh, s**t….."

"Maverick, what happened?"

"I'm going to fal-" Maverick then fell down the cliff-side. (He'll be perfectly fine; after all, he's kind of needed…)

"Maverick!!?? MAVERICK!!!?? MAVERICKKKKKKKKKK!!!!???"

---------------

Kavan completely ignored Maverick falling down the cliff-side (though he was looking right at it) when he walked through the city streets; he simply wanted to get to the area where all the other students were. He looked at the card that said where to go, and the number of his group—"Group 34"—and looked around. Odd, he didn't see it anywhere….

"Hey, you're on group 34 also? God dammit!"

Kavan looked around to see he one person he disliked: Paul. Paul was a bastard, through and through. He already had that annoying purple hair (In Kavan's views, his hair was so much better. Paul countered this by saying that no one ever sees Kavan's hair), but that modest gray t-shirt combined with that Royal Purple over-shirt made Kavan think lowly of Paul to begin with. (Paul, like usual, countered this by saying that Kavan's jacket was only good for looks, that it was pretty flammable, and that basing your opinion of someone based on the clothes they wear was something only gay men and women do.). The two shared similar tastes in jeans, though Paul didn't have the ice graphics on his, of course.

What really irked Kavan, however, was that Paul was always better than him. Always. Paul just knew something Kavan didn't, and his prediction skills were amazing. Paul always knew what the opponent was going to do, and exactly how they would do it.

Topping things off, Paul shred the same strange defect that Kavan had; this annoyed both of them, they felt less unique knowing that there was someone else like them.

"Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in." Kavan jeered. "Stopped sucking your own d*ck long enough to talk to me?"

"Shut up, mister Russian. All you are is an annoying brat. What, did you chop your balls off when you were eight, or something?" He looked over at Lunto, and scowled. "And I see that your Lucario is still a piece of trash."

"Hey!" Lunto snapped. "I'm not trash! At least I'm not like your aggravating Blaziken!"

"You know, Paul, why are you even going to this school, when you have a fully evolved starter? Surely you know how to battle?"

"Hah, Kavan, you ask that question? You know why, we may have ridiculously evolved Pokémon, but we still need to earn the correct way of battling!"

"But, why, Paul? You can predict anything! Why should you of all people, need to learn battling?"

"I may be able to predict, but I still am an in-experienced battler. I only got this Blaziken from my brother, you know."

"And, I only got Lucario after rescuing him for a fi-"

"LOOK OUT!!!!!!!"

Before Kavan could even turn around (or even send the signal to his legs to turn around), someone collided at top-speed into him; this sent Kavan into Paul, who promptly flew a good ten feet.

"Hey, you slowed me down! I demand 100 poke' from both of you as compensation for that!"

"What!?" Kavan and Paul said at the same time. "But we haven't even seen you yet!!!"

"Well, get up!"

Kavan and Paul both staggered to their feet, and saw the kid who had run into them. He wasn't that tall, considering how hard he had smashed into Kavan. His attire was familiar to Kavan; It was the outfit of the trainers that hung around the arcade, with a sweater that had alternating white and orange striped, and an odd green tie…. (Kavan had noticed that those arcade-goers were quite odd….) Moving on, his jeans were some kind of gray. (Finally, someone without gray jeans!) His blonde hair was some kind of odd style, with the ends looking sort of like two mountains slowly rising up into small peaks. He had a single backpack that looked stuffed.

"So, you ran into us." Kavan said.

"Indeed, he did." Paul replied.

The kid extended his hand out. "Well, where's my compensation!?"

"Who are you?" Kavan asked with an incredulous look on his face.

The kid proudly raised his right hand and saluted. 'Me? Why, my name is Barry, of course! You may have not heard of me, but I'll take this place by storm!"

"…..Are you going to Smogon University?"

"Why yes….actually, do you know where group 34 is?

"We were looking for that two…"

"Well, let's just go together!"

"Wait!" Kavan quickly objected. "If we go together, stupid fangirls are going to think we're all gay for each other!"

"They would think anyway." Paul retorted.

"Yeah, your kind of right. Let's just go."

----------------

On top of a skyscraper, two stereo-typical white thirteen-year-old teenage girls were staring at the three boys; well……they weren't actually thirteen; hell…they weren't even girls. They were, in fact, two men in their sixties(?) who were spying. (Why they had to be in those costumes, not even the lord knew) One had a briefcase.

The first one ("she" had blonde hair; the other one had black hair) looked over at Kavan. "We must get the egg to him before it hatches, Mark!"

"That's fine, Rog, but why are we wearing these costumes?"

"I don't know, it was your idea, pedo!"

"Well, we must get the egg to him fast. However, because someone didn't get those voice changers, we still sound like sixty-year-old men!"

"Hey, Mark, I'm on a budget here! We have to make sacrifices! You know we spent a crap-load of money on the costumes, and a bunch of time explaining why we needed these costumes!"

Just at that point, Maverick climbed up to the roof of that skyscraper. He stared at the "girls" for a second. "Who the hell are you!?"

"I'm Mar- I MEAN, I'M MARRISSA!"

"You sound like an old man…..screw it, I'm gonna throw a grenade and forget this all happened.

"Wait, if you throw that, we'll all fall sixty stories…"

Maverick had already grabbed the grenade on his belt and threw it. It exploded, knocking all three of them off the skyscraper.

"OH, S**T, WE'RE FALLIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!"

------------------

Maverick fell into a truck transporting pillows. (Ah, the stereo-typical conveniently placed item in a story)

"Who the hell would leave a truck open like this?" He grunted as he jumped out. "Hey, I'm all for conveniently placed items, but that was….too convenient…." He noticed that he was on a steep slope.

"I see that you are on a mission, Maverick."

Maverick twirled around to see the person he heard. He saw nobody, but then witnessed as the very champion, Cynthia herself, "phased" in front of him.

"What the hell?"

Cynthia calmly stroked her hair. "What? It's just one of Okaton's inventions!"

"Yeah," Maverick stuttered as he reached for a pistol. ",but….you….phased into reality!!"

"Your friend simply makes amazing inventions."

Maverick pointed the gun at Cynthia's face. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

Cynthia slapped the gun out of his hand, caught it, and pointed it at his face. "I'm simply here, on request of your friend, Jenny.

Maverick took interest, suddenly; Jenny was an operative for the army who had known Maverick when he was in the army. He hadn't seen her ever since he had been kicked out three years ago.

"What does Jenny want?"

"She's working at Smogon University. Says it's something very important."

"That's all she told you?"

"Yes. She says it's linked to the mission that you and Okaton are undertaking."

"Interesting….." Maverick then pointed at Kavan and company. "Say, do you know any of the boys down there?"

Cynthia looked over to check. "No, but I do know the girl running to meet them."

Maverick looked over to see a girl, who literally looked exactly like Cynthia running to meet the boys. "Her? It's going to take her around 20 minutes, even running at that speed. Who is she?"

"My sister, Mau-ri."

"Sister? Surprising…. Wait, how do you know Jenny?"

"I can't tell you that."

-----------------

It was barely a few seconds before Kavan started running, that he slipped on an oil slick.

"Ah, what the hell!?"

"Gay-boy away!"

Someone landed in front of Kavan, and proudly held his hand up. He was….very disturbing, considering that he looked like a girl Kavan had heard of; her name was Dawn. He looked way too much like her; all the way down to the color of his hair.

"Who the hell are you?" Kavan asked as he staggered to his feet, making sure not to slip again.

The boy proudly held his hand up. "Why, I am Gabriel, of course! And, it doesn't look good for you!" He made sure to make his voice sound extremely effeminate.

"Why?"

"Because, If you trip, you're secretly gay and want to bat around my white sausage."

"Nice try, Gay-Boy, but I'm not going to bat around your white sausage."

"Dammit!!!"

----------------

Maverick watched as Gabriel conversed with Kavan. "Damn, that guy looks straight gay!" He then peered at Mau-ri running to meet the others. He noticed that two other girls were running after her. "Wait a minute, I know those girls running with your sister! They were in the file Okaton gave me! Their names are May and Misty…. Wait, Misty's a Kantonian Gym Leader! Why would she be with them?" Maverick started running towards them. "I've got to find out. This could help my investigation!"

"Wait!" Cynthia yelled as Maverick ran. "There's an oil sli-"

Maverick was already too far ahead. As he turned around to reply, he slipped on the slick, and started sliding down the slope. He then crashed into a huge bunch of oil drums, coating himself in oil, causing him to slide even faster.

"SH*****TTTTT!!!!!!!!"

-----------------

Mau-ri ran ever faster as she dashed down the slope. "Man, those twenty-three liters of soda I had today really paid off! I've never ran this fast! But, I have to stay focused! I must get this letter to Kavan and those guys!"

Behind her, May and Misty were running as fast as they can. "Man, Mau-ri, do you ever tire out!?" May asked, incredulous at Mau-ri's ability to run for hours on end and never get tired.

"Nope!"

"Well, I hope we get to them in time. I'm going to be learning how to be an instructor for this school, so I hope we can get this over with soon!" Misty said.

"Why aren't you a Gym Leader anymore, Misty?" Mau-ri asked, still running at top speed. "Quit?"

"Yeah, I just felt like being an instructor; you know teaching people how to battle. I'll still be a student there anyway." Misty replied.

----------------

Maverick was still sliding on the slope at incredible speed. He then saw that he would collide with the girls.

"LOOKKK OUUTTTT!!!!!!!"

It was, unfortunately, too late. May (She was at the back of the pack) saw Maverick right before he collided right into all three of the girls. The quadruplet then flew down the slope even faster than Maverick was already travelling.

They then reached the four boys, and smashed right into all of them. The septuplet then was knocked about thirty feet in the air, before hitting the, cold, hard, concrete.

"What…..happened……?" Kavan stuttered as he struggled to regain consciousness.

Maverick got up and immediately started to apologize. "Oh, I am so sorry for causing all of this…."

-----

Mark and Rog had landed on some hard, tracks of some kind. Mark continued to look through the binoculars. "Dammit, this guy might get in our way! We have to get the egg to Kavan!"

"Mark…" Rog stammered, as he looked uneasily away from Mark.

"What?"

"I'll let you know we're about to hit by a train."

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Well, there you go, the first chapter! Solid snake look-a-likes, sixty-year-old men dressed up as teenage girls, and gay dawn look-a-likes? This isn't your average fanfic, that's for sure!


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